Last night was our second annual Halloween Party for my teenagers. I have to say I think it was a success. All the kids were laughing and having a good time which is always a positive sign. It was a costume party and all the kids were dressed up as very different things. They listened to music, told stories, played Taboo and another game called Murder at Midnight. Needless to say they were all happy and very respectful kids. I love getting to know my kids friends. I also love offering a safe place for my kids to interact with their friends. Teenagers can get into trouble under the wrong circumstances but I think if more parents would allow their kids to have friends over like I did last night things would be better for everyone. Here are just a few of the pictures from the party.
So it is interesting how you can love someone so much but in the end you realize the struggle is just not worth it. Wednesday morning I finally decided I’d had enough. I guess you could say that I realized all the bullshit he was giving me was just that bullshit. We hadn’t seen each other in over a month but yet he tried to tell me that he missed me. He tried to tell me that he wanted to see me but things were just busy. I guess you could say I finally called him on his bullshit. I sent him a message on Wednesday morning and told him that our situation no longer worked for me. He never even responded which didn’t even surprise me. Oh well at least I finally got the closure that I never got last spring when he just disappeared from my life after five months. I have no idea why things worked out the way they did between us but I know it is definitely time for me to move on. It is so strange because I’m not even really upset. I had grown so bored and just plain indifferent when it came to him that I am just relieved to know that I don’t have to deal with the lies and bullshit anymore. I still love him but I know that we aren’t meant to be together so it is time to leave myself open for the man that I am supposed to be with.
I have talked about my first love before but now it is part of my challenge. We met when we were 14 and 15. We only dated a few months when we first got together but I still fell in love. We remained in each other’s lives for the next six years. After that I didn’t talk to him for several years but no matter how many years we spent away from each other, somehow we always found a way back to each other. He helped me get through my first divorce and he remains one of my closet friends even now. We don’t see each other very often but we do try and get together twice a year on our birthdays. Here is my first love and I in August at the Pudge Rodriguez Hall of Fame Game.
- I am 42 years old.
- I have a son and daughter.
- I have a master’s degree in curriculum and instruction with the emphasis on literacy.
- I have a bachelor’s degree in journalism with the specialty of public relations.
- I am currently taking classes to obtain my dual credit certification in English.
- I am a high school English teacher.
- I attended 16 Rangers Games last season.
- I am currently in my 10th year of teaching.
- I have taught at two different high schools.
- I have been married twice.
- I am currently reading It.
- I have a collection of Harley Quinn Pops.
- I have a dog named Lily.
- I drive a Hyundai Sonata Hybrid.
- I have been divorced for almost four years.
- I was born in Texas and I have lived here my whole life.
- I read more than one book at a time.
- I sleep on the left side of the bed.
- I spent six weeks in Cochabamba, Bolivia during the summer of 2016.
- I spent six days in Spain during spring break of 2016.
- I am five foot two inches tall.
- I have taught senior English for five years.
- I have an IPhone.
- My classroom is decorated with Harley Quinn figurines.
- I walk two miles every morning before work.
- My mom is one of my best friends.
- I live in a two story house.
- I sleep with two fans every night.
- I enjoy baking.
- I have seven tattoos and three piercings.
So I was born on November 25th so I am a Sagittarius but I am a cusp of Scorpio because my birthday falls in the first three days of the sign. I would say that it mostly fits my personality. I am stubborn and I tend to be private which might seem surprising considering what I post on my blog but in real life I am. I love people but I also love to spend time alone. I would say that the one thing about my sign that doesn’t exactly fit is how I feel about relationships. I enjoy being in relationships as long as they are healthy. I am also not a proponent of cheating despite the way they make my sign out to be. I won’t say that I have never cheated but it made me feel awful and I always ended my relationship right away. I do tend to get more mellow with age but I think that is pretty normal for most people.
I see him occasionally and I hear from him a few times a week but I miss him. I miss the way he used to look at me when we were in love. I miss the way he always touched me and smiled at me. I miss the fact that he used to send me messages every morning telling me good morning beautiful. I miss the him saying goodnight every night. I know we are both busy and all that attention to detail would be hard for both of us but there is a part of me that misses it. I guess more than anything I miss spending time with him. I haven’t seen him in over two weeks. Sometimes it feels like casual dating is really not working for me. I want more than he can give me. I will eventually have to walk away in order to get what I need. It is hard to walk away from someone you love though. I miss him all the time right now so I can’t even imagine how much I would miss him if we didn’t see each other or talk anymore.