We all have our own definition of love and what it actually means. Today while I was stuck in the Santa Cruz airport I had the opportunity to witness something extremely sweet. There was this older couple sitting a little ways away from me and they were reading to each other. At one point the husband grabbed his wife and gave her a kiss. It was such a sweet moment. I watched them for a pretty long time and I even took a picture of them.
It doesn’t give you the full effect of their intimacy but I had to include it. I sat there thinking about love and intimacy while I was bored out of my mind today. I realized that I would love to have a relationship like that. A relationship where you can be surrounded by people but the only one that matters is the person you love. I have had so many doubts about love lately. I want to believe that it still exists and that I’ll find it one day but I’m not so sure anymore. Until I met my ex I never believed in fairy tales but now I want the very tale. I don’t expect any relationship to be perfect but I want it to be true. I am tired of spending time with people that really don’t get me. My ex doesn’t even understand me. I’m really hoping that I can use this time away to reevaluate myself. I need to figure out what I really want out of this life. The idea that maybe being alone is my fate has been weighing heavily on me lately! I mean my parents were married for 59 years and now my mom has a boyfriend! Less than a week ago she found out her boyfriend had cancer. I want to believe that we all get a chance or several to be happy but I’m not so sure!