Confusion

Ok so today the ex informed that he was in fact going to be at my graduation but he plans to slip in at the last second and he plans to slip out when it’s over.  I am honestly not going to even know if he’s there or not.  I guess I’m confused because it seems like a lot of trouble to drive all the way to Arlington for a graduation only to leave without speaking to the graduate.  My son said tonight that I was nicer than he is because he would have just told my ex that he shouldn’t even bother coming if he’s not going to see us.  The funny thing is that I thought the same thing when he told me but for some reason yet again I didn’t stick up for myself when it comes to him.  My old friend that is coming already told me that he wants to sit near my mom.  I’m so glad that he will be with my family at least.  I wish the ex was planning on sitting with my family too.  I refuse to let it bother me though.  Graduation is too important to let myself be distracted by the ex and his crazy antics.  I do respect the fact that he’s willing to make me a priority by showing up but it would be nice to get a hug from him when it’s over. Maybe I’m just being selfish but it would just be nice to see his face when it’s all over.  There is just something about the way he looks at me and the way he makes me feel that calms me a lot.  I’m honestly not sure I’ll be able to get through the whole thing without crying and he’s the one person that can understand that.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s