Eventually

How do you define the word eventually?  How do you understand what someone means when they use the word eventually?  I would rather he just talk to me and tell me what he’s feeling rather than act like he can just put me off for as long as he needs to.  So he hasn’t spoken to me once since he used the word eventually with me.  He sees me at work and church but he doesn’t say a word.  I feel like we are back to the same place we were before we started talking again.  I just don’t get it.  How can he hold me in his arms all night three weeks ago and now he’s not even talking to me?  I really don’t understand what he’s thinking or feeling.  I want to let him go for good but for some reason my heart just doesn’t want to let him go. I was hoping that if we started talking again then maybe we could figure things out.  I love him more than anyone I’ve ever been involved with.  I want to move on with my life eventually and not be stuck where I am forever.

Last night I went out with some of my coworkers and I really had a good time. One of them was this guy that started working in our department who i had never really talked to that much.  It turns out he’s really cool.  We kind of hit it off and we were both flirting.  It was harmless but it was fun too.  He was actually giving me some good advice.  I am hoping that he becomes a good friend.  It is always nice to meet new people and go out.  I was glad that I wasn’t at home alone on a Friday night.  I think it is important to spend time with other people besides my ex-fiancee and the ever present ex.  Life is short and last night was the most fun I’ve had in I don’t know when.

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