I had someone accuse me awhile back of not being able to be alone. They expressed a doubt that I’m ok by myself. You know it is funny that they would tell me that because most of the time I feel alone even when I’m in a relationship. Most of my relationships are more of a distraction than anything. I think I’m starting to confront the idea that I’m supposed to be alone. I have been married twice and to be honest I’m not very good at being married. I don’t really like having to compromise and I don’t really like having someone around all the time. After awhile just about everybody gets on my nerves.
I am alone now in almost every aspect. I am not dating anyone and I’m not in a relationship with anyone. I’m ok though. I feel like he was projecting his own feelings of resentment in a way to make me feel guilty for the way I have lived my life. I will finish school on Saturday and then I will graduate in December. I will spend time with my family and friends over the next few months. I don’t need a relationship to be happy. I have my writing and my students. I also have my children. I am going to focus on me and what’s important to me. I’m done focusing on a man and what’s important to them over my own needs. It is time to stand on my own two feet.